Since I was a teenage I have always had a fantasy about exposing myself to boys and men. Well, I never did that, got married and am now 43 years old. I love my husband dearly and have a 20 yr. old daughter and an 18 yr. old son. We live near the beach and enjoy it with my husband on weekends and once or twice during the week I go alone. I keep myself fit and have 4 bikini’s 2 very revealing which my husband doesn’t like me to wear. Those 2 I wear during the week when alone and am often excited the way young and older men look at me. There are many occasions where I feel myself becoming aroused and wet sometimes. My sex life is great with my husband but many times after returning from the beach I have masturbated because of the looks and attention payed to me. Then approximately 10 months ago my fantasy developed into the real thing.

My master bedroom and bathroom are located at the rear of my condo. One night last August two young men were tossing a football around out back. There are no fences separating the yards so the second night I saw them out there I opened my bathroom window and lifted the shade far enough that they could see inside. They seemed to be out there several nights a week and it was almost a week before one of them finally saw me in the shower. I actually know him slightly because he lives 3 condo’s down from mine with his parents. I know he is in his mid 20’s and his name is Marty. I have since then had Marty and 2 of his friends see me naked more times than I’m willing to admit. I only do this during the week, always when my husband goes to the union hall on Tuesdays and when ever he is busy or out somewhere. I’m now comfortable only leaving a couple inches of the window open knowing now they are brazen enough to walk up on my property. They not only see me shower but watch me undress in my bedroom. I’ve been shaving my pubic hair for many years and can’t believe how aroused I become when I know one or more of them are watching me. The only one I know is Marty but think they are all in mid to late 20’s.

There are times I am ashamed of myself and feel like I’m cheating on my husband which I have never done. I have stooped so low that I often let them see me masturbate both in the shower and my bedroom. It seems all 3 are out there on Tuesdays. The other night when I feel safe when my husband goes out I simply leave the light on. I wait hoping at least Marty will show up which he normally does and more than not at least one of the other guys. What was a fantasy for so many years has become an obsession. I can’t really explain this but knowing they see me naked causes me to become aroused. This cannot be normal and why did I begin doing this when I was 42. I can’t conceive of what my husband or children would think of me if they knew what I was doing at least twice a week. I realize to that I have been exposing myself to my husband more than usual and presently have sex 3 or 4 times a week with him. There are nights I have exposed myself to Marty and his friends, masturbate and yet an hour or two later have sex with my husband. I am so easily aroused anymore even while on the beach. I see plenty of girls and women in bikinis and wonder if they enjoy the attention from the guys. Does it arouse any of them or am I crazy. I’m afraid my husband will find out but I’m so excited by exposing myself I doubt if I will stop doing it. I just can’t control the way I react when they watch me naked and the arousal of it takes over.